Why Terrified Electricians Need Public Liability Insurance

I have a dog. A big, vicious dog named Bruce that I keep securely locked in my large back garden. Despite copious exercise, food and tender loving care, Bruce remains a ferocious animal, allowing no-one but me near him. The vet now wears chain mail gloves, ever since he lost two fingers down Bruce's throat. It wasn't the dog's fault that the assistant nurse stepped on his tail when the vet was trying to retrieve a rabbit bone lodged in one of Bruce's back molars.

I am naturally security conscious, and have a genuine concern for the welfare and safety of my neighbours, so I erected a huge 'BEWARE OF DOG' sign on the gate, surrounded by blazing neon lights. The trouble occurred when the flashing sign melted a circuit in my house.

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I contacted a local electrician to fix the wiring the next day. Unaware of the hell-hound lurking in my back garden, the electrician came into the house to check the problem. As soon as he entered the kitchen, he noticed Bruce peering at him through the glass of the back door. There was no way Bruce could get in the house. Unfortunately, the electrician did not know that; for a moment, their eyes met, like predator and prey. Bruce lowered his bristling head and let out one single, deep bark. It was nothing really; just Bruce teasing the visitor. The electrician, however, dropped his screwdriver, screamed, 'Mummy!' and jumped up into my cradling arms.

I am not particularly strong and, judging by his shape, this electrician obviously enjoyed his puddings. His unexpected exclamation startled me, while his ample weight sent me toppling backwards. My head smashed into the fuse box, showering sparks everywhere, causing a nearby dishcloth to catch fire and burn my arm.

Writhing in agony, I was dimly aware of the terrified electrician tearing out of the house and down the street. I never saw him again, but his company sent someone else to fix my wiring. They also paid for my kitchen redecoration, settled my medical costs and awarded me ample compensation. They were fortunate to have the foresight to invest in public liability insurance; without it, they would be out of business.

As for Bruce, I think he chewed up and swallowed the electrician's screwdriver. That means another trip to the long-suffering vet.

Copyright John Bennett 2005 All Rights Reserved